I say that we should all give pause

To think about this Santa Claus,

He is the man behind the scenes—

The symbol of what Christmas means.

If we could rub him out, my friend

Our troubles would be at an end.

Just think how it would tickle us

To liquidate St. Nicholas!

Lucretia Borgia from “The Plot of Overthrow Christmas,” first broadcast December 25, 1938 on CBS