We’ve lost prestige, and I greatly deplore

That we stand to in danger of losing more

In the way of confidence and spirit.

We’re far from our goal—we’re in no way near it!

And this is the reason: though we’ve done well

In carrying forward the work of Hell,

We’ve left a very big job finished:

After all these years there is undiminished

Good will on earth every late December

Because of Christmas. Now please remember

That as long as this continues to be,

The Race of Man will not belong to me!

The Devil from “The Plot of Overthrow Christmas,” first broadcast December 25, 1938 on CBS